We begin with a recap of how my suit got to this state of disarray. Attired in my solid charcoal suit, crisp white French cuff shirt, and royal blue tie. Now, sufficiently covered in thick gunge, my suit is heavy and cold against my body. The slimy goop made my suit shiny and heavy. Stepping into the shower, I let the torrent cascade down my ruined suit, slowly massaging the gunge out of the wool fabric wondering if my suit will ever be the same again. Once I am fully soaked and my French cuff shirt is clinging to my chest I slowly remove my loafer and pour the contents down my suit. The memory of using my loafers as a bowl to pour more and more water on my suit still makes me hot when I see others' loafers.